Saturday, May 28, 2011

The first first one bites the dust

Growing up as a girl you are constantly drowning in fairytales of Prince Charming, that will one day come and sweep you off your feet and you will live happily ever after. Disney movies and Hollywood like to paint this perfect picture of what a relationship should be. Making your heart race and creating the butterflies. Teaching these young and impressionable girls that if you walk away, he will chase after you. That falling in love can happen in a matter of day. That once you meet The One, you will just know.

With this toxic information, I fell in love at 16. He was a couple years older then me, had this smile and charm that he could turn on and off whenever he wanted. I was completely under his spell. I didn't even feel worthy to have been able to date him. Of course I had the older girls jealous and mad at me for dating this Prince Charming. These said girls, were even so mean that they would tell him not to kiss me or date me. Now of course being much older I see how jealous they were, but at the time I was crushed.

I basically had won the prize. I was dating Brad. The Brad. He had never had a girlfriend, or kissed a girl. He was of the same Faith as I. So of course I had basically planned out our entire future in the matter of an hour. Brad and I got extremely comfortable with each other to fast and to soon. Oddly enough I was able to keep my virginity. We had only dated for a little less then a year, but managed to do everything but sex. Of course he also managed to do these same things with my best friend at the same time. Because of this I turned my sorrows to Skyy. Oh how it warmed my soul and took away all the pain. I could go on and on about how much he hurt me, but honestly, compared to the rest of guys I dated...this was the most boring relationship I had. Other then all the crazy things I did. Whether it was canceling his dates prom hair appointment or helping the spread of rumors that he knocked up his girlfriend. But that is another story for another time. (COMING SOON)

Can you imagine being this perfect girl and never have doing anything too bad and the first chance you get to go to the dark side,you don't come back? My full out rebellion began. I also truly believe that dating Brad shaped the way I treated my future relationships.

I began at this point to drink, dress immodestly and learned how to play the games. The games of dating. 

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